Parenting Moments That Catch You Off Guard

How is it possible that my seven-year-old is more emotionally mature than my parents ever were?

We were watching a movie a while ago where the parent got angry at their kid for spilling something. We try really hard not to react like that with our kids, so it caught my son’s attention. Later, he asked me how my parents used to respond when I spilled something. I told him the truth: they got angry, every time. Accident or not, their first (and often only) reaction was anger.

He didn’t like that very much. I think he felt a little sorry for me. 😂

Fast forward to today. I was experimenting with frosting cupcakes for his birthday and messed up on one. I apologized, kind of brushing it off, “Sorry about this one. The rest are fine, though.”

He looked at the cupcake, then at me, and said,

“It’s okay, Mom. It was an accident. It’ll taste the same and I love it anyway. I won’t get mad at you like your parents did.”

And that just hit me.

Because the truth is, love didn’t come easily in my house growing up. It was conditional. Weaponized. I had to earn it, and no matter how hard I tried, it never felt like enough.

So when my son offers me love that freely, without strings, without punishment, without keeping score, it’s hard to accept.

Sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve it.

But he gives it anyway.

He has no idea how much that moment meant to me.

It was just a cupcake to him.

But for me, it was something a lot bigger.